I recently came across a really interesting book. I'm a reader, and if a book grabs me you'll usually find me with my nose in it until I reach the back cover. I read all kinds of books, some related to work, some for my own personal growth, some just for the sheer pleasure of using my imagination. I work in full time singles ministry at a church. A lot of the books I read pertain to my job...discipleship, leadership, relationships, etc. For some reason a lot of "interesting" books in regard to dating and marriage seem to make there way across my desk. I'm not sure if people are trying to drop a hint or just aid me in my ministerial studies (I'll choose to assume the latter). Now, not all of the books I've come across have been worth the read. Some I don't even get all the way through, although there is great benefit in learning what NOT to do in relationships. But every now and then I come across one that I can hardly put down or stop talking about because the contents inside preach a message so contrary to today's culture that I want to shout it from the rooftop.
As a single person there are a lot of things about marriage that I don't know, but one thing I do know is this... marriage was designed by God and it's good (keep in mind that good and easy aren't the same thing). I also know that the legacy that is currently being left behind in regard to the sanctity of marriage, or lack there of, is leaving singles wounded, skeptical and downright fearful of something that if done God's way can be one of the greatest blessings on the planet.
Since working in singles ministry the past two years God has put a real passion in my heart for relational health, for myself as well as for others. Some may look at today's culture and wonder if marriage can redeemed. My friends, I believe it can. The marriage rate in the US has dropped drastically in the last decade. As a result, we have the oldest and largest singles population in our nations history. I'm not by any means saying that being single is bad. I would be talking to myself as well, if I were. However, as the contents of this book will show, the current singleness trend can be directly linked to many unhealthy thoughts, feelings and behaviors. And it's my hope that the following information will help us to take a step towards redeeming a genuine belief in marriage, as well as help us to see marriage the way that God intends.
The Singlehood Phenomenon sheds light on 10 brutally honest reasons people aren't getting married. The authors, Tom and Beverly Rodgers address real issues as well as provide Biblically based solutions. I'll let the book do the talking...
From the back cover..."The Singlehood Phenomenon is full of hope for singles who have yet to give up on marriage. Dr's. Beverly and Tom Rodgers address the top ten reasons singles aren't getting married and show how social trends such as cohabitation, rampant divorce, and the fear of getting hurt make finding a soul mate that much more difficult. Difficult, but not impossible! Deal with your skepticism about dating, love and marriage and overcome the reasons you stay single. Learn how to integrate psychological principles and biblical truths to develop healthy, godly love relationships."
Ten Brutally Honest Reasons People Aren't Getting Married:
1. Skepticism about love and marriage-I'd rather be alone than in a bad marriage.
2. Lack of faith in God's provision-I'm not sure if I have a soul mate.
3. Unresolved issues from the past-I always seem to attract unhealthy people.
4. Confusion about the rules-I don't even know how to date.
5. A poor understanding of the purpose of marriage-I think being single may be an easier way to live.
6. Fear of Getting Hurt-I don't want to be hurt again.
7. Wanting the perfect mate-I'm not a perfectionist, I'm just picky.
8. Not dealing with prior heartbreak-I don't want to feel pain.
9. An unbalance focus on career-I want to be established before I get married.
10. Concerned that the marriage will fail-I don't want to get divorced.
Any thoughts?
2 comments:
This sounds very interesting. I believe it will make its way onto the list. I'll have to get back to you once I've read it. I love books too!
i'd like to hear what the book has to say about these reasons, if they're legit or not, especially #1.
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